Sunday, February 22, 2009

No Pain-No Gain? Yeah Right

I have never experienced such pain and agony in my whole life. Birthing babies is a distant 2nd. I should have been more prepared, heck I just shouldn't have done it! What was I thinking? I guess I thought I was willing to pay the price. I just had no idea it would be this painful.

I got my lip waxed.

How do these people do it? I thought, well I've been doing my eyebrows for years, this shouldn't be too much worse. WRONG! When she ripped that cloth of death off of my lip I cussed her like a sailor. (That was after I bitched slapped her) I tried to regain composure and apologized to the other clients who were in earshot. I did not apologize to the lady who did it because I think she was enjoying it way too much. Have you ever seen the movie 40 year old virgin? Do you remember the chest waxing scene? Well, that was me, expect I didn't yell Kelly Clarkson.



I braced myself again as she began applying the molten hot wax to the other side of my upper lip. Now that I truly know what I was in for, I could keep my composure this time and just grin and bare it. WRONG AGAIN! I think it was worse than the first one. There were even more flying cussing words. Words that I didn't realize I knew.

It felt like a million needles stinging me all at once. A burn unlike any sunburn began to radiate across my upper lip. I felt my flesh trying to crawl away and die somewhere.

I'm not sure what was worse; the waxing or having to go to the grocery store with a bright red burn mark across my lip.

So ladies, those of you out there who may think this is something you should try, let this post be a warning to all of you. Sometime the price for beauty is just way too high. Buy a lady razor instead.
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